“Hey, Jamy, do you have a minute?”
This was the question the athletic director asked me as I was getting ready to take my college basketball team on a team-building experience.
It was early January and school had not yet started.
Little did I know that in the next few minutes, I would be receiving my invitation to a well-known club that has plenty of members all across the country.
“Jamy, we are going to go in a different direction at the end of the year and you will not be returning as our head coach.”
And just like that, as one of the younger head coaches at the NCAA level, I was a card-carrying member of the “I Got Fired” club.
Oh sure, I wasn’t technically fired. I got resigned. They allowed me to resign. How nice of them. But why get caught up in the details.
I was now a member of a club that contained people from all levels of coaching and all levels of success. We were terminated with or without cause, were forced to resign or retire, we were people whose contracts were not renewed, people who were laid off, or people who were re-assigned. The bottom line is that somebody above us on the organizational flowchart didn’t want us coaching the team anymore.
If you are not a card-carrying member of this club, then you are probably relatively new in your first-ever job or are one of the luckiest people alive. Notice, I didn’t say that you are really good at your job. There are hundreds of reasons as to why a person joins this club. Seemingly no one is immune.
Bad workers get fired. Mediocre workers get fired. Good workers get fired. Men get fired. Women get fired. Employee-of-the-Months get fired.
No one is immune to this phenomenon. In 2018, Dwane Casey led the Toronto Raptors to the best record in the Eastern Conference and earned NBA Coach of the Year honors, but was fired after his team lost to Lebron James’ team in the playoffs.
Sometimes we see it coming; other times it blindsides us.
As a member of one of the biggest clubs around, here are 5 things you should keep in mind when you find yourself joining (or getting your membership renewed in) the “I Got Fired” Club.
By the way, if you are not yet a member of the “I Got Fired” club, then file these thoughts away or keep them in mind to help out a colleague. Also, pick up a copy of Harvey Mackay’s outstanding book “Dig Your Well Before You Are Thirsty”. One of the best books ever on building a true network of friends/contacts that can be a blessing to you when you enter the hallowed grounds of THE CLUB.
- Proper Attitude – The old Charles Swindoll quote, “Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it” is true. Getting rejected (i.e. fired) stinks. However, you can choose how you react to it. In The Pirates of the Caribbean, Captain Jack Sparrow says, “The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude toward the problem.” Stay focused on what you need to do. It may feel like the end of the world but you need to find the positive in your circumstances. Don’t let one setback define you. This is only a failure if you react negatively toward it.
- Don’t Burn Bridges – You never know when you’ll need a good reference, help with another job, or something else. Burning bridges rarely helps. It might make you feel good at that instant but it is not a long-term solution. My initial reaction was to lash out and defend myself. However, the decision has been made for this situation. How can you turn this negative into a positive? Maybe the A.D. (or your supervisor) will help you out or put in a good word for you in a situation that is a better fit.
- Provide a Positive Example – Many people don’t want to listen to how you got the raw end of the deal, were wronged by someone else, or what your problems are time and time again. They have their own problems. However, think of how refreshing it would be to be out with friends and to talk with them about their life? To ask about their issues, their families, their hopes and dreams? Most of us want to talk about ourselves and the predicament that we now find ourselves in. Turn it around and be an encourager to others. Be an inspiration. Wouldn’t it be great if someone said this about us… “Wow, so-and-so really is staying positive after what happened. I know I’d be ticked. I wish I could have that attitude. But I guess if they can be positive, then I can be positive in my situation as well.”
- Bad Things Happen to Good People – This doesn’t mean it is easy or fun, but you can move on from this (sometimes to bigger and better things). I mentioned Dwane Casey earlier, but he is not alone. Lou Holtz, Larry King, Bill Belichick, Joe Torre, Michael Bloomberg, J.K. Rowling, Steve Jobs, and Oprah Winfrey are just a few high-profile people who have been fired and gone on to great success. If you get fired, you are not a loser. It is not the end of the road. It is just the beginning of a new adventure. Don’t dwell on the bad stuff or think you are worthless. See where this new road takes you. Understand the reality that others have been where you are at and have come out on the other side. A setback is just a setup for a comeback.
- Be Prepared – Think about questions people might ask or situations that might come up so you know how to address them. You may or may not be able to control the news of your firing. Try to keep a clear mind and a long-term perspective on this short-term problem. Play chess and not checkers, even in the midst of this painful time. Much like the bridge-burning issue, in the age of social media, the internet, and “small-world” networking, a mistake in handling your dismissal could limit your future opportunities. Stay focused on how you can make the best of a bad situation. Don’t play the victim card or lash out at others. Use your energy for good. Spend your time thinking logically about your situation. Use this event as a way to improve yourself and get better. Develop a plan to move forward.
After joining the club I talked with a fellow member, Ed Schilling. He had been fired as the head coach at Wright State University. He essentially told me that I get to choose whether I will be bitter or better because of this. Those are the only two options. I can dwell on the past, be angry, and let it control me or I can learn from the past, be grateful, and develop as a coach and person. That firing actually helped me be a better coach and led to a great deal of success at future jobs. It even allowed me to help others going through similar situations, including when I was an athletic director and had to make difficult personnel decisions.
It never feels good to join this club the first, second, or even third time. However, life is not about perfection. It is about growth, development, and progress. Sometimes we’ll win but other times we’ll lose … I mean, learn. Always be learning. You never lose – you never fail – unless you quit trying to get better. Joining this club just means you now get the opportunity to fail forward.