Has your season been disappointing? Are you frustrated with your results? Do you have a sense of despair? Do you feel that there is little hope? If so, then I want to encourage you today to run the race with perseverance and finish strong. Don’t be discouraged.
I am reminded of the Jacob Riis’ quote concerning rock sculptures…
Look at a stone cutter hammering away at his rock, perhaps a hundred times without as much as a crack showing in it. Yet at the hundred-and-first blow it will split in two, and I know it was not the last blow that did it, but all that had gone before.
Just like the stone cutter, you don’t always know when good will come but you do know that if you quit, it will never come. Last season (editor’s note – originally posted on October 16, 2015), our football and volleyball teams at Marion H.S. were both struggling. However, they didn’t quit and kept on persevering. Both teams were able to put it all together and win first-round sectional games in the state tournament. If they had let despair get the better of them, they never would have found success.
Abe Lincoln lost 2 sons and countless political races but persevered through disappointment to become arguably the greatest president in U.S. History. Moses stuttered but overcame that obstacle to become one of the greatest Biblical leaders. Michael Jordan got cut from the team during his sophomore year of high school, yet became a Hall of Fame basketball player. These are just a few examples of individuals failing forward….of people refusing to quit.
Just like our teams last year that were so close to positive results and refused to give up, what is your mindset? Are you going to keep persevering or are you Darby? Let me explain…
The story is told about R.U. Darby, who went to California in search of gold and untold riches during the 1800’s gold rush. Everyday he got up early in the morning and walked to the hills in search of his “fortune”. He dug and dug with his simple tools. He found some gold here and there. But never anything to write home about. The story goes that he finally gave up digging because he was convinced that he could not find the “mother load” he was searching for. Hearing this, another prospector came to him and offered to buy all his tools. R.U. Darby agreed and sold all his tools for whatever money he could get for them. This prospector then went on to hire a land surveyor, an engineer and geologist, all whom combined their knowledge and went to work on the mine where the first man had been digging without results. It is told that upon studying the area and the mine, the men discovered that R.U. Darby had been literally three feet from where the real gold deposit was. Literally 3 FEET! The poor prospector who had given up was so close to the gold, he could reach out and touch it. But there was no way he could know this because he gave up too soon.
Are you Darby or do you have a champion’s mindset?
You face choices every moment of every day. Will you win the play? Will you win the day? You can choose your actions. You can create your own luck. You can create what happens to you, based on your decisions. You create your future, both by your actions and non-actions. You control you. You have influence on your friends. You choose to do things the right way. Are you losing the game badly? Are you in the midst of a losing streak? You still can play every play like this is the most important play in the SuperBowl.
Last spring, I was watching a baseball game in which we were losing big. Our baseball team was doing better than they had done in many years but still had a losing season. In this particular game, our best pitcher was struggling. Late in the game, he hit a routine ground ball. He was definitely going to be out but he busted his tail down to first base. He was out by a mile but I vividly remember him having the personal integrity to play every play like it mattered. I will forever remember that Eli Foreman gave his all when it would have been easy to just coast, go-through the motions or felt sorry for himself.
Feeling sorry for one’s self is not the way to handle frustrations or disappointing seasons. The following story provides an interesting illustration to this…
Karl Menninger was a world class psychologist who was on the cover of Time Magazine at one time. He was speaking to a large college class once and afterwards, someone asked him what should someone do if they were depressed or distraught. Instead of mentioning counseling, he said to “board up the house, go across the street, find someone in need and go help them.”
The only way to beat despair or frustrations is through engagement. Get out of your own little world. Stop being selfish. Help others. Don’t point fingers. Add value to others. Do you feel like coach doesn’t praise you enough, then praise others. Find ways to help and lift up others. Leadership begins with you. I encourage you to make a beautiful stone sculpture today by continuing to chip away and pound the rock.
Jamy Bechler is a former college basketball coach and championship high school athletic director at Marion High School in Indiana. He now travels the country as a John Maxwell Certified Leadership Speaker and Coach. Contact him at CoachBechler@CoachBechler.com to find out how you or your team can be more successful.